Street Fighter transcript
Season 2 · Episode 8. Generated automatically, so expect the odd misheard word.
Hello, and welcome to the worst movie podcast. I'm Ade. And I'm Aaron, and this is a podcast where we watch the worst movies ever made in the hopes of finding a hidden gem. Enjoy. So what have you been watching lately? I just started watching Severance. I got Apple TV for the F1, and I was like, I might as well watch this. What do you what do you think so far? How far into it are you? I'm only like on the third episode, but uh I really like it so far.
Yeah.
Very uh interesting concept. It is.
Have you watched it? I watched uh 1.3 seasons of it. Uh why it's so specific. I don't know. I just I watched the first season and I feel like I kept watching it because uh I I love the the original concept, like I liked the first couple episodes, felt like it kind of dragged in the middle, and then really hooked me. It was like the second to last episode in the first season or the last episode, something like that. Like, okay, yeah. Like I really love mystery box shows. I'm sure we've talked about it several times on the podcast, but like Lost is one of my favorite shows of all time. And yeah, but then I felt like the second season, they just were like, let's make it even weirder, and like just throwing things in. And I don't know, it just maybe similar to Lost. No, Lost is Lost is great. I I loved the expansion of the Lost Universe and like uh I don't know, let's I could talk through the entire episode about Lost. This was not Lost for me. I felt like I was I just got kind of bored and it was like a a little tedious. Yeah. Maybe I watched most of the second season.
I didn't I mean I'm only three episodes in and it's already kind of tedious, like all the it's just home life and then the generic office building. Yeah. But yeah.
Uh yeah, and it's yeah, it kind of drags uh a lot. Like it's not, I don't know, Lost had such interesting characters and like Yeah, it's a much slower pace than Lost for sure. Yeah. But we've been watching. Enjoy it not to I didn't mean to spoil it for you. You've ruined it for me already, so thanks. Yeah. Sorry. I watched Crime 101, the Chris Hemsworth like heist uh crime movie. It's in theaters right now, but I have not heard that. It should be on Amazon Prime soon. It was an Amazon movie. It was okay. I'm curious to hear your opinion on it. I felt like when I watched the trailer, I'm like, this this movie is for me. Just inject it straight into my veins. It's like kind of like uh the rip in the sense that you know it's like here's a well-known formula, just hit all the all the right notes, and I like the cinematography. I liked like all the acting was great. It's Chris Hemsworth, Mark Ruffalo, Holly Berry. Yeah, um great cast. But it just felt very like generic. I don't know. Like it didn't, it didn't feel I like I was just Jonesing for a twist or something super unique. And then Mark Ruffalo, I just got done watching Task, and I I like Mark Mark Ruffalo a lot, but he just plays like sad sack cop way too much. Yeah, and maybe it was just so yeah, maybe just so suit after task, but I was just like this is like like your I like your I don't know, he's so much better.
What's it on? Where did you watch it? This is in theaters. Oh okay. I just watched a Chris Hemsworth this week. Extraction.
Uh what's that about? I think I've seen that.
He's like a Air Force guy that gets embedded with some special forces thing on a mission where they're trying to extract somebody and it goes bad. It was good. It was a Netflix movie. Yeah, I think I've seen this. Yeah, it was forgettable, but fine.
I did rewatch the town too this week. It was good uh yeah, I don't know, just in crime mood, I guess. But uh such a great movie.
I like that movie. Uh who's the female actress in that the lead actress? Uh I forget her name.
She's really good in it. Um not Blake Lively. No. I thought Blake Lively lively was great in it. Apparently she I didn't really remember this, but apparently she got a lot of heat for that part, a lot of criticism. I don't understand why. Why? But I don't know. What was the criticism? I think people just didn't like the character maybe in it. Uh Rebecca Hall is who you're thinking about.
Yeah. Interesting. I didn't know that about I'm I wanna I'm curious about that now. I'll have to look that up later.
Um speaking of criticism, we got some criticism about segues. Uh let's talk about today's movie.
Yeah, we're not taking any feedback, thanks.
Any negative feedback. We'll take all the positive feedback. Oh yeah, yeah, that's true. Well, today we're gonna cover Street Fighter, the movie from 1994, starring Jean-Claude Van Damme and Raoul Julia, directed by Stephen E. D'Souza. He wrote and directed this. He wrote Die Hard, Commando, and 48 Hours as well. Uh, 11% on Rotten Tomatoes, but a box office success, had a three $35 million budget, made about a hundred million in the box office, and uh Capcom financed this movie, and apparently even as of 2024, they said that the movie's still making tens of millions of yen each year, which translates into 10 million yen is like sixty, seventy thousand dollars, so hundreds of thousands of dollars each year. They got four bucks from me. Yeah, same here. Did you s see this movie? Did you see it when it came out? No, I didn't. It seems like it would have been it like right in your wheelhouse. Were you too young?
Um, probably a little bit. Like we didn't have um video game consoles till maybe right around this time, and we got Nintendo 64. So I don't I don't know. This wasn't a Nintendo game, was it?
No. Uh were you too young for arcades? I mean, this is primarily arcade games.
Um yeah, I was probably a little too young for arcade games at that time. Uh but wow. I was like, I grew up mostly playing Tekken and not Street Fighters. So I like I knew the characters and I played it at arcades and stuff, but yeah, this was not like on my radar because I was what 94?
94 this came out. Seven years old. And I think Street Fighter 2 came out in 93 or 92. This was I think 91. Really? Well early 90s. Yeah, most of the characters are from Street Fighter 2.
Yeah, which I didn't understand that. Why yeah, 91, you're right. I guess the it was new characters in Street Fighter 2 versus one.
Well, Street Fighter 1 was primarily just Ken and Ryu and M. Bison. Like it was they fought against like henchmen and then end bosses. Uh if I if I remember correctly and and read correctly. Street Fighter 2 is like what really took off and is what That's what we think of when we think of Street Fighter.
Okay.
And it's a it's at least what I think of, because I in the early 90s was like I was in middle school and spending time in arcades and um even just like remember arcade games and pizza huts and like stuff like that uh around the country, and um much less like the mall arcade and stuff like that. And so there was around this era, I played a lot of arcade video games. So um when I think of Street Fighter, I think of Street Fighter too.
Our Pizza Hut had the Ninja Turtles arcade game, which is what I grew up playing. I love that game.
Yeah. There was also a what was it called? There was some like off-road rally game. Maybe it wasn't off-road, but it was like a track, some like sort of racing game that was at our Pizza Hut. I played a lot.
Interesting. Uh I don't remember. Um Oh my god, it's like right there. I can't think of it though. I don't know. Uh fun times. Yeah. Golden tea.
That was a little later. Yeah, I I feel like I was a little too old for golden tea. That was like but yeah, there was uh it was like college kids and bars. Yeah. Like we're really into golden tea, and I was I was probably a little too old for that. Um but anyway, so you you didn't see this movie. I I'm surprised, but none of this movie seemed familiar to me. Like, I don't know why I didn't watch this movie when it came out. Like it seemed like it would have been aimed right at me. Um, maybe I saw it and it's just I've been wiped from my memory. I remember seeing Mortal Kombat in theaters and being like so excited for that and loving it. Um I should say.
Yeah, I played a lot of Mortal Kombat too as a kid. Like I somehow missed Street Fighter.
Yeah, I should say Mortal Kombat was more my jam. Like that was I played that way more than Street Fighter. Yeah.
And I only played that because my cousin had it. And so I just played whatever he had.
Yeah, I think Mortal Kombat maybe translated uh I I play that in arcades a lot, but may I like I feel like between the two, remembering playing them on a console, like I feel like I only really remember playing more Mortal Kombat on consoles. Yeah. Sure, I I know Street Fighter was on consoles, but I I don't remember playing that as much. Yeah. Who who is your go-to character in Street Fighter?
Oh, I don't know. I I I don't think I have one. You?
I remember playing a lot of uh different ones. I played Chen Lee a lot. I played E Honda a lot, the sumo guy. Yeah. And I played uh Delsim. I don't know how I'm saying it right, uh, which I was really disappointed he like never the character was in this movie. He was the professor that or the uh scientist that was Oh, that was creating Blanco. Yeah, and he like throughout the movie, he started looking more and more like him, but they never showed him with like the extent. He had like he was a yoga guy in the game and had like really long arms that would extend and do stuff. Oh um yeah, his powers never materialized here.
Yeah, he was just a regular dude the whole movie. Yeah. He looked like shit at the end.
Well, uh yeah, I like I didn't really under they were like slowly giving him brown face, it seemed like, because the character is uh is definitely like Indian or something like that in the game. And oh really? He was just a white guy in the movie. Yeah. Uh he was very white. Yeah, we'll we'll kind of I have a point about that, uh a hot tag about that later, but a little bit more background uh about the movie. So D'Souza said he wrote the initial draft of the script overnight, which sounds right. Yeah. Uh which I wouldn't be surprised if they're like no edits. Uh we'll just ad lib the rest. There's not a ton of plot to this movie. Well, one of my hot tags is there's too much plot. Um, but let's come back to that.
There's too much not fighting. I don't know if I'd call that plot.
Well, I guess I'll just say now uh I felt like so the Mortal Kombat movie. So Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter are very similar in in terms of like the gameplay. You're just let me pick my favorite character and then fight against other characters, and like they all have special moves and stuff like that. And Mortal Kombat, the movie, was like, hey, we're gonna have a fighting contest, and you just watch yeah, like your characters come to life on screen and fight. This was so infuriating because it was like an hour and 20 minutes in before we got our first fight. Yeah. And it was uh um I Honda and uh I forget it's uh Zangif, the Russian dude. Yeah. And then they like cut away after like five seconds, and then they just show that fight like in like shortcut. It was like they're trying really hard not to just like give us what the fucking game is, which is like these characters fighting each other.
Street fighters. Yeah.
Yeah. They're like, let's let's take every little like teeny bit of backstory that you got from this game that had no story, really, uh, and just like expanded into this like generic movie.
Uh yeah, it was they teased a fight at the beginning between Ryu and and um Vega. Yeah, Vega. And then as soon as it's about to start, uh Jean-Claude Van Damme bursts through the wall literally in an APC and breaks up the fight.
Yeah, they keep doing that. Like Chun Lee starts a fight bison, and then it's just like he escapes into a secret room, a safe room, and gasses them. Which I was like, what who designs their office that way? Where was that his office or his bedroom?
I don't know. Who designed it was his bedroom, I think. He changed into his robe and started pouring drinks in there.
Yeah, I guess so. And was just like I have the secret like gassing mechanism just in case I supervillains.
That's that's who designs their bedroom like that.
But yeah, anyway, back to the background. A few other quick points. Apparently, I said $35 million budget. They cast Van Damme and Rel Julia first, then they had just with those two, they had spent most of the casting budget. Yeah. Like they didn't have any budget left. And so it's like complete unknowns and people who obviously have never acted before, and my guess is given zero acting instruction.
You didn't like this movie a lot more than I did. I I thought it was fine. Yeah, I mean, yeah, that's probably so this is I wasn't expecting good acting from the Street Fighter movie, so no, it wasn't a good movie, but it it definitely started to cross into the like so bad it's good territory for me, where it's like this is just terrible.
Everything is terrible, but I laughed. Everything is terrible. Raul Julia was incredible in this movie. I loved it. Uh yeah, but there are a lot of things where I like laughed because of how bad it was. Yeah. Um, last background thing, which I found fascinating. The original cut of this was rated R, and Capcom was like, no, no way. Oh and so the second cut was rated G. Slight overcorrection there. Yeah. And then and then they finally settled at PG 13 by adding expletives in post-production. Oh man. And I don't know how this is for Wikipedia, so I I did like do a deep dive into the sources.
I was like, There was a lot of dialogue that seemed dubbed uh like after you know in post. Yeah, that seemed really rough. They're just adding in a fuck here and there to make it not seem like a baby movie. Do you want to give a quick synopsis?
I mean, I think everybody wants to.
Yeah. Yeah. Uh so I'm just gonna read the IMDB thing. It says, uh, in the middle of a civil war in Southeast Asia, a general who's M. Bison, that's Raul Julia's character, raises the stakes by kidnapping 63 AN relief workers. That's the Allied nations. Uh, it's like the UN. Uh to free the hostages, Colonel uh Guile leads a group of fighters who will have to use all their skills to be successful. That's it. Uh, but they do spend a lot of time on the plot, but there's not a ton of plot to it. You know what I mean? Yeah. So the plot's weak, but they spend a lot of time on it.
Yeah, it's hard to it's hard to describe. Um what what's uh by the way, what what's your relationship with Jean-Claude Van Damme? Like, were you a fan of his or do you like him?
Honestly, I don't I I haven't seen much that he's been in. I think I saw an expendables with him, but I I think like I was just slightly too young for like his movies when they were really big. He was probably before your time. Yeah, like people just a little bit older than me were more his target base, I think, a target audience. So yeah, I haven't really seen much with him in it. I was also into weird stuff when I was a kid. I was not into like arcades and stuff. Wait, what what were you into? That seems I wasn't like into like Elvis and like like I don't know. I was more I would rather go to like Graceland and and Memphis than go to like the arcade.
How often did you go to that seems like those seems like very different trade-offs? Like, what do you want to do tonight? Let's go to Memphis.
No, well, I mean, I went several times as a kid with my dad, but yeah, I don't know. Like I just wasn't into like pop culture stuff necessarily. I was into older stuff.
Yeah.
I don't know. Yeah, what well, what did you think of John Glaude in this movie? I mean, he's not a very good actor. He did exactly what he was supposed to be, though, which is rip your shirt off and flex your muscles and like deliver a few lines here and there and then kick the shit out of the bad guy.
I mean, part of my problem with it, like they didn't he didn't get to do his thing enough in this. It wasn't until the end that he was really and then it was then it just I don't know, it came off as like really cheesy to me because his signature thing is his kicks. Like he's yeah, he's just really good at the roundhouse kick. Yeah, he doesn't there's like one fight at the end where him and Raoul Julia are, and that that's like really the only time he's fighting. There's too there's too much stuff at the beginning where it's the it's the plot not plot stuff where he's trying to act and he plays this UN commander, the uh I'm not the UN. Uh but it like there's too much dialogue for him that's like normal dialogue, not action movie dialogue.
Yeah, agreed. So yeah, there was way too much uh build-up to the final showdown at the temple or whatever that was, which is really where the only fighting takes place.
Yeah. I have a bunch of notes that just like one-off things that I laughed at. Um, but one of the first is like so the part of the setup is Bison is I don't know, evil villain trying to take over the world, and the AN is trying to stop him, led by Jean-Claude. And it was this like weird initial scene where they each hack the news to talk to each other. I don't know. But bison has kidnapped all these people, and one of them is Jean-Claude's friend Charlie. Yeah. And like as he's talking to him, he's like, hang in there, Charlie. And Bison like looks over and is like, oh, your friend. Like, why would he call out by name the one person he could use as a leverage? Fucked me.
Yeah. Um just gave him like an ace in the hole right there.
Right. Like he didn't know that you were related or had any sort of relationship.
You could have just spoken to all of them and said, We're coming for you, or we'll get you out. That would have been reassuring. Yeah.
Bad idea in a hostage situation to let the villain know that you have a relationship.
I'm coming for you, mom.
And then one of the funniest things is to me, part of the overplot is that Jean-Claude is driving this boat down this river, and he's like the only it's like the only boat that anyway, it's like this futuristic boat. Yeah, futuristic boat. And at some point he pops in a video of him and Charlie on a double date, I guess. Yeah. And and it's just like uh, I forget the song that was playing in the background, but he's just like driving this boat on a like on a mission, and it's just like reminiscing wistfully watching this movie and this video, Charlie. Yeah, he's going into combat and he's watching home movies. Like, why does a stealth boat have a VCR and TV? Oh and it's like that, it's not very big, it's just enough room for three people, I guess, like shoulder to shoulder. Like they just had to remind the audience that, like, yes, he has a personal connection.
Case you guys forgot. Well, because Charlie like spends the whole movie basically doing nothing. Right. Uh he's stuck, he's being transformed into to Blanco, the the green guy with the orange hair. But he's basically in a tube getting uh brainwashed for the whole movie, so he doesn't do anything. So you it's easy to forget that there uh there's a story there.
I'm just I'm just gonna go through my my if you have other notes, let me know. But uh even the extras are terrible. Like they're they're um but I have to I I'm realizing through this podcast that I have some really weird nitpicks um with movies. But one thing that bugs me is like I feel like that's this trope where there are underground fights in a movie or a TV show. Um yeah, which you are referenced the uh where Ryu and Vega are about to fight, and it's this like cage match. Yeah, and there are all these people around in the audience shouting and waving money. And I'm like, that's not how you bet on fights. You don't just wave money in the air. It's not like there's some official I've never been to an underground fight, but I swear it wouldn't work that way. You're not just gonna be like, oh yeah, that guy in in 3C was waving $300 in the air. Let's pay him out when this fight is over.
I don't know. I've never been to I can only I can only go based off what I've seen in movies. Yeah, it was like Deer Hunter or something, or like the the cock fight that uh Frank got mixed up in in uh always.
They're just waving money.
Which I think is based off of the deer hunter, wasn't it? Yeah, I think it was. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, it doesn't seem like a good way to uh keep track of bets.
Uh but that's it and many others are like A lot of extras and the extras just look like they're motors. Like they're they're just like waving waving their arms in the air and just like looking around. Yeah. Yeah. They were not um good. Uh one of my hot takes about this movie, hear me out. This is gonna sound controversial. Uh too many white people. Yeah. It it felt confusing to me what the geopolitics was, like where this was set. Uh it's set in Asia, right?
Yeah. I mean, the so they've got like this language that you see everywhere that looks like Thai, but it's English. It's like written in English, but it's got like the Thai like curls and flares to the language. So it's like seems like Thailand or something, but yeah. But it's a lot of a lot of white.
I mean, it is the Allied nations are there, so maybe it's but even the villain side, like uh I forget what his name, the guy with the eye patch, who's like one of the the secondary villain villains. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Um but he has his henchmen. I I don't really understand why, but like it's like you'd see a bunch of like Sawata?
Yeah, yeah. Oh no, Sagat, Sagat.
Yeah, yeah. And then like all of a sudden you would just see like a henchman that like looked like he was from Iowa or something. And I'm like, wait. Yeah. Uh yeah, there there was a lot of uh I mean I guess it's you know, maybe I should be happy. It's like this utopian melting pot of but I I was just generally for us white guys. Yeah, I was just generally confused. Finally represented in film. Yeah, yeah. Thank God. Uh and then obviously like the the whitewashing of uh the scientist guy that I mentioned mentioned. Um yeah, there are a few characters that it was like, I don't I don't think they were white in the game. Also, even just like I didn't understand where Jean-Claude was supposed to be from until the end. Like I was like, well, yeah, he's you know, he's part of the the UNAN, like he's you know, probably from Brussels. Like he could be from Europe, you know, that's fine. Like he has a heavy ass accent. And then he rips his shirt off and he has an American flag tattoo. Yeah. We're the melting pot. Yeah, by the that tattoo looked like a carnival like stick-on tattoo.
Yeah, it was way too bright and it had texture. All of the tattoos were bad in that. Like none of them looked real in that movie. I just looked it up. The actor who played uh Dalsim, the scientists, is from New Delhi. Oh, really? He's Indian. He they had him, I guess they white faced him in the beginning because he looked like a white man. I guess I didn't know that.
Feel bad for criticizing him. Cut that, cut that, cut that. Don't steal a prison truck inside the army base. There's this whole thing. It's too convoluted to explain this plot, but Ryu and Ken are arrested and then they like break out like while they're being transported. But it's like they could have just waited five minutes and not had the entire AN military shoot at them uh inside the prison.
Yeah. They also freed all those other prisoners who might have been like actual legit prisoners.
Yeah. Most of the plot centers around the AN not knowing where Bison is and his headquarters. How did they not know? He has like a full on, like I mean, he has this huge complex and this like huge open air market, I guess, where they're like selling weapons and yeah. And then it shows later the AN has this like sophisticated satellite technology that can like zero in on somebody's face, but they like just couldn't find this guy.
Yeah, I took so I think that Sagat was an arms dealer. He he was selling weapons to M. Bison. Yeah. I took that open air market as like this was one of Sagat's places that he was dealing, that was his operation. No, it was it was at Bison's headquarters. It was at Bison's never mind then.
But I I got confused in the plot because there were like way too many people like track putting trackers on other people, and then this whole like plot where Jean Claude Van Damme pretended he was dead because I don't know why. Uh and then yeah, it was way too complicated.
Yeah, what was the purpose of him pretending to be dead?
Like, why wouldn't you just continue to do your job and not like and he wasn't even quote unquote dead for that long? Like it made no the same day he was discovered as alive. Yeah. Um Bison has some plan that he just mentions in passing, but it doesn't come up later about kidnapping the Queen of England. And it's like, okay, why?
Yeah, I don't know. He also has plans to build a uh big city called Bisonopolis that we don't ever that doesn't come to fruition.
Which look pretty cool. What would you call your city if you built a city? I don't know. I've never thought of that. Do you have a do you have an answer to that? I have so many good choices. Uh I haven't ever done.
Let me just ask, are the people who live there gonna be free? Or is this gonna be uh situation?
No, it's all about freedom and liberty and justice and a new way of life. Uh so speaking of which part that concerns me. Bison has this big speech about how he's gonna build bisonopolis and it's gonna be this like utopian world and blah blah blah. And even like, I don't know, there's a semi-funny part where Zangif is like, like, that's so beautiful or whatever after he does that speech. Zangief was kind of a funny character. Yeah. And uh so Bison really believes he's like bringing this utopia to the world. Um is he actually the realize they're fill-ins. Is he actually the good guy in this movie? Because I don't and this may have been purposeful, but the very next shot is like they go back to the AN, and there's this announcer saying, talking about the curfew, and and the announcer is like uh talking to the city, I guess. I don't know. I guess they're just these broadcasts that are like curfew starts at whatever, 9 p.m. and says anybody who resists will be shot. Yeah. And I was like, wait a second, but like, why did they just play that right after Bison's Utopia speech? Yeah. And then I'm like, did Bison, I guess I I mean he did kidnap the people, but like the the AN people also like you know, Jean Claude just rams into the uh that like underground fight, probably kills like half a dozen people at least. Uh you know, just wanton destruction in this in this town.
Like, I mean, they're kind of they're very much an occupying force. Right. Here, yeah. Like maybe John Claude's the the bad guy in this. He might be. I mean, like, I don't know that anyone is like a good guy. Even like Ken and Ryu are questionable, like their ethics are questionable. Well, they're they're arms dealers. Yeah. Like they uh like they're supposed to be the good guy, like they're likable and supposed to be the protagonists of of this story, but they're also not like good people. Yeah.
By the way, uh there's so many, there's so many bad quotes, but um near the beginning, they are selling weapons to what's his name? I already forget the the iPatch guy. And and Sagat turns around and like his henchmen have the weapons and like pointing them at Ryu and Ken, and he says, Surely you're not afraid of your own weapons. You can get killed by your own weapon. Like they're not like my own, you know, like flesh and blood. Yeah. They don't care.
But they turned out to be toy weapons. That's why. Were they? I mean, not all of them. Yeah. Well, the the ones that they were selling were toy weapons, but then the bad guys showed up with their own real weapons and took them prisoner. Okay. That makes sense. I don't know why they were selling them toy weapons. I didn't I didn't understand that. That's just another example of like so much fun.
Just like get to like we want to see Ken and Ray fight people. Yeah, hurry up and fight. Bison back to bison. He uh one of the funny things about his c character is and this whole complex that apparently he was able to be in stealth from the entire world is he has his own brand of serial system. Did you notice that when Chun Lee was in his room, he like dims the lights and turns up the music. Uh huh. I think he's trying to seduce her, I guess. I don't I don't know. I didn't know what that was about. That was a little uncomfortable. Uh but it's like uh I f I forget exactly, but it's like, you know, bison area or whatever. Like I don't know, bison stereo or something like that.
Oh, I didn't catch that.
I mean, he's it's like uh it was very, you know, Batman 60s esque. Like a lot of the bat phone and the Batmobile. Yeah. But one of the things that was uh I I loved about his complex is throughout there were several times where the he had um like an announcer over the intercom, like the company-wide intercom, yeah, uh saying things like intruder eliminated, intruder eliminated, yeah, hostage pit open, hostage pit open. And I was like, did somebody did they hire somebody to record all these like scenarios?
I had the same thought when they were when they were uh creating Blanco. Yeah, it was like muscle mass increased by 49%, muscle mass increased by 50%. And I'm like, it does it for every percent.
This poor voice actress had to uh record like just weeks and weeks of potential dialogue. Yeah. Or it was or it was somebody live who was just like being fed stuff, or or he had like the greatest AI caution, wet floor. Yeah, and then at the end it's like, I don't know, something's about to blow up, and obviously like the whole base is about to explode, and she's counting down, and it's the sexiest countdown you've ever heard. Five, four.
It was of like why she's in there, probably. She's gonna get blown up. She's counting down the last seconds of her own life. I mean, it was so hard. Yeah.
Uh such a cheesy movie. Yeah. Bison has the worst henchmen. Uh surrounding John Glump Van Dam, they have they're all on the balcony, so they have they have the height advantage or the whatever. Uh he he's down in this pit. They all have automatic weapons, like a dozen of them, shooting at him, and he has one pistol. They don't touch him at all. No, horrible shots. Yeah. Um, and then at some point, they're worse than stormtroopers. Yeah, and then there's a scene where he runs up to them and they just stop shooting.
Yeah, I was so confused in that scene. Yeah. Cause he's like, he's on this catwalk, he's got nowhere to go, and he just has a knife. Yeah. He pulls out a knife and they just stopped shooting. But then they got surrounded by the AN. And I was like, were they there the whole time?
And that's why they stopped, or Yeah, it seemed like that was the joke that he that he thought they were so intimidated. But they wouldn't just I mean, even if the AN was there, they wouldn't stop shooting. They were shooting at him the whole time. Like that it was this like you know, five, ten minute long gunfight, like shootout, and then they just stopped shooting at the point that they have him cornered. I don't know.
Yeah. You could still kill the commander of the AN, like right there. Yeah. If that's what you're after. Yeah, he had two, like his top two henchmen were DJ and Zang Geef, and DJ betrayed him immediately as soon as things went bad. He was like, fuck this, I'm gonna steal everything I can take and get out of here.
I I thought that was actually really funny, where he's like, and bison is just like uh out of the soliloquy about how he'll fight, you know, keep on fighting or whatever. And DJ is just like, uh.
And then he runs into Zang Geef on the way out and is like, Bison's not a good guy. Like, and he was like, Oh my god, bison's bad, and he's just convinced that easily to switch sides.
And he's like, Why did you work for him? And he and he's like, Because he paid me maybe a shit ton. I don't know what he said. Uh he didn't say shit ton, but at the end, he's like, You got paid. Yeah, you got paid? I thought I thought that was funny. I liked Zang Geef. Yeah, I thought that was funny. I mean, it was it was cheesy, but yeah. Uh I also have to M Bison's suit was uh so over the top, like you'd be really hot in that.
Yeah, he's got like a wool hat on, like a military cap, and then uh like a huge cloak and a leather suit. Yeah, but like padded. Padded leather suit that also has the ability to revive him from the dead. I mean, I guess that part would be really awesome. Yeah, yeah. I liked too in the uh in his compound, they had like in a uh like an attack mode or something that they could, and there's this handle that you would lift up and turn and push down, but the handle said alerto on it. I'm like, what? It was I didn't notice that alerto. And I'm like, what is this some form of like uh you know like bad English translation? So just throw an O on the end of it and then yeah, it'll sound ethnic.
It was so stupid. I mean, it was a it was an elaborate underground layer headquarters thing.
Yeah, I liked uh when Hondo, I think Hondo was fighting Zangif and they were fighting in the model city of Bisonopolis, and they kept playing Godzilla sounds the whole time.
Yeah, I was a little confused about where those sounds are coming from, but yeah. Yeah, I like that. Who would you least want to fight against in Street Fighter from the movie?
Probably Vega. Those claws were actually kind of fucking scary. Yeah. Uh yeah, definitely top top top two, three. Uh I I oh man, uh Hondo jumped on somebody on one scene, like he jumped from a ledge and landed on him. Like that had to fucking hurt in real life when they filmed it. That's a big man.
Yeah, I think my lease would be Ionda. Who would you most want to be? Um Bison.
Yeah.
I mean, I guess if he if you could come back from the dead and uh fly. Yeah. Or levitate or whatever that was. Yeah. Yeah, it was levitating. Yeah. Uh I don't really remember what his powers were otherwise. I think he's just really strong and tall. I don't know.
Yeah, he was tall. Is was Raul Julia that tall? Because he was towering over Van Damme. Yeah.
And he was the boots. I don't remember playing Guile at all on the game. Like I feel like he was one of my least played characters. And kind of makes sense because he's just kind of boring, even in the movie.
He's the kind of character I would have picked, though, when I played. Yeah. I was always into like the army guys. And he seemed like an army guy. Soldier from Overwatch. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's just because I suck at every other DPS.
I have a few quotes that I thought were funny. Okay. Well, well, some some are funny, some are just like, where did this line come from? Uh there was a point where Chun Lee escaped from the AN and somebody like she like jumps out the window and like parkours out. And the guy was like, What a screw up. I don't like what I don't think that I don't think that means what you think it means. Yeah, like you're the screw up.
Like she uh she evaded you. Yeah. Uh Bandam says, What a woman. Yeah.
Uh then Chun Lee spits in Ken's face and he says, You'll dehydrate yourself. Which uh good comeback, good comeback. I'll I'll use that next time a woman spits in my face.
Yeah.
The next time. How often are women spitting in your face? Cut that back up. I liked um when I Honda and uh I forget the the boxer guy. Paul Rog. Yeah, they were captured at M. Bison's base, and uh he says, Give me a hand. He's trying to escape. And Honda says, We've only been in jail two hours, maybe next month. I like that. Uh uh and then DJ. Yeah. And then DJ, he's escaping as the base is exploding. And he he mutters, I should have stayed at Microsoft. Did you catch that?
I was like, this must be some th like I get the joke, but is why was that uh written into the movie?
I don't know. I didn't under I didn't really understand it. Was he supposed to like a former Microsoft engineer or something like that? Like is that backstory?
Yeah, or was something going on at Microsoft at the time, like 94? It was I mean peak peak Microsoft's uh Yeah.
This was before or around the Windows 95 release. I don't I don't know. Like a yeah, I guess like they were they were exploding and I mean yeah, it seemed like they were insinuating that he used to work at Microsoft. I don't know. Yeah, it was very weird. Did you catch the post-credit scene? No.
Yeah, mine just switched to something else. I didn't like it started playing the next thing and I didn't know there was one.
No, there's a post-credit scene. So the post-credit scene was omitted in theaters because Raoul Julia just died, but in the movie, uh at the end, the uh sexy announcer is like solar power uh is on and like like power being restored to like a like and then and then you see Raoul Julia's you know and bison's arm coming out from the rebel. Oh and uh and then it it's uh the announcer is like, What what program would you like to start with now or whatever? And it like shows this like menu and uh it like s selects world domination, like that's part of his software. Yeah. Uh and he activates it. So nice. It it reminded me of uh the ice cube world war of the worlds, where like the software medis are hyper specific.
Yeah. There was a line of dialogue in this movie that I wrote down because I was like, this doesn't make any sense. And then uh I was confused by it and I looked it up, I actually learned something. Okay. Uh at the at the arms market when they're selling uh to Sagat, there is somebody selling an armored personnel carrier, and he says it's surplus from Iraqi army, five speeds, two forward, three reverse. And I was like, why the fuck does it have three reverse gears? Uh turns out that's just common on military vehicles because they have to go and reverse a lot and tow things backwards. And I was like, huh, I didn't even know that was a thing. But I was like, that's so stupid. I also thought it was like, is this some like Easter egg of like forward two, back three, you know, some kind of combo or something? But no, it was that's just how they actually are.
Yeah.
Uh like a up, up, down, down, left, right, up, yeah. Yeah. I thought it was something like that, but no, that's just how APCs are, I guess.
Uh yeah, there there really weren't any video game references. Um that I caught anyway.
Yeah, same. I mean, there was there was a barrel that had Capcom written on the top. Okay, I missed that. But it was it was at the arms market too when Chun Lee got inside that barrel and uh yeah, they tossed it around. It said Capcom on the lid.
Like every character in this, I'm like, what was your plan actually? Uh yeah. Uh like Chun Chun Lee has uh spent her whole life seeking revenge on M. Bison, and in order to do that, she became the lead reporter for an a an international news organization. I guess just in the chance that she could get close to him.
There's gotta be other ways.
There's gotta be other ways. By the way, did you know I learned this just after watching the movie, but M. Bison, the character was originally Mike Bison and was the boxer guy.
Yeah, he was supposed to be Mike Tyson.
Mike Tyson, and then they switched it for the US market.
Yeah, I think that the bison character in the movie was a originally called uh Alrog, maybe? Yeah. Like their names were switched. Or uh no, he was Vega. He was called Vega. Hang on. The black guy? No, the black guy was called M. Bison in Jap Japan. Yeah, yeah. And then uh M. Bison, the head honcho guy, I think was called Vega.
Gotcha. Yeah. Yeah. They shuffled it all around in the game. Yeah. For the US market.
Yeah. But it I was like, oh, M. Bison makes perfect sense for the Mike Tyson like character.
Yeah.
Yeah, he was called Vega in Japan. And and uh Balrag was called M. Bison. Uh we haven't talked about Raul Julia's performance at all. Yeah, yeah, go for it. I thought it was incredible. I like I had heard that it was like he was he was in a different movie than everyone else, and yeah, I thought it was going to be like campy and silly, and it was like like the the subject was camp, but he gave it an earnest 110. And like, yeah, I thought it was an incredible performance for like a video game adaptation where everyone else can't act at all. And like he stole every scene he was in, and thankfully he was in a lot of the movie because if if he weren't in it, it would have been unwatchable.
Yeah, he was good in it. I I I think it's hard for me to fully appreciate because so much of it was like didn't didn't make sense in terms of the plot, and he wasn't given much to work with with some of the dialogue, but yeah, he did well. Oh my god.
I mean so lukewarm on it. It's like I was like, this is the final performance of his life, and it was a banger. And uh banger's a stretch for me, I guess. I mean, considering considering the subject, yeah. He made he made that character more than it should have been.
Yeah, in in a I mean, you could have had any other person, any other actor in that movie, and it would have been a much lesser performance for that part.
Yeah, I think he uh uh just from that performance alone elevated the movie to something it wasn't if he if he wasn't in it.
Yeah, that's fair. I don't really have much of a relationship with him. I know I've seen him in like Adam's Family and um like some of his uh smaller roles. I can't remember off the top of my head, but like I I wouldn't have known his name before watching this, to be honest.
I saw that uh I can't remember the the uh publication, but they called him the best actor to never have received an Academy Award nomination. Uh but he was, I mean, he won Tony's, he won Emmys, uh, he won Saturn Awards. Like he was a very talented actor and like he gave it his all in this role.
Yeah, I believe it.
Yeah, it was a good I like he he made it worth watching for me. Like I would watch just his a cut of just his scenes. Yeah uh because everyone else was kind of bland, but but he he was in a different movie.
Yeah, maybe that maybe that would help if I just watched it without all the other stuff. I yeah, maybe if anyone's gonna watch this movie, if you just like start watching halfway through the movie, it's probably a much better movie. It's probably a much better movie. Yeah. Yeah. The first half of the movie, nothing happens. Yeah, and it's just it's just all this terrible setup that doesn't matter. Like like they could have just started with like, we know that like he we're gonna go attack his base, and they just go do it. And then like they all fight.
I I told you before we started recording, but I did appreciate this movie for uh like the aesthetic of being on film with like actual effects, practical effects, real explosions, and like it did it did feel like my childhood, even though I have I have no like strong connection to Street Fighter. I did I'd appreciate the aesthetic of the movie. And it was silly, like I I feel like they don't they there was a long stretch uh like post 9-11 where movies got super serious and dark and gritty and ultra real like realism, and like I kind of enjoyed the silly, carefree, like stupid nature of this movie. And yeah, so uh I'm appreciated for that.
Well, which was the aesthetic of the game, I think. Like Mortal Kombat was the serious dark one, uh hyperviolent, and Street Fighter was more cartoonish. Um I was just gonna say uh they're coming out with a new one in October of 2026. It'll be interesting to see what that's like. Have you seen the trailer? Oh no, I didn't watch the trailer.
I watched the trailer. It looks like it could be fun. It looks like it might not take itself seriously, which is good. Okay, and it I don't know, it's it looked fun. And there it looked like there was a lot more fighting in it than the first one.
It stars uh Jason Momoa as Blanca and Fiddy Scent as Balrog. Yeah, I'm excited. Uh yeah, it'll be interesting. How old is Fiddy now? Probably in his 50s, right? Yeah, he actually is actually uh exactly fitty. Exactly? Yeah. Oh, nice. Till July. Oh, Eric Andre is uh in this movie? Hmm. Yeah, this will be interesting.
Yeah, I think it might be fun, and I hope it's like a return to Kyle Mooney, isn't it too? Who's Kyle Mooney?
He was an SNL cast member. You'd you'd recognize him.
Uh I don't know if I recognize. He doesn't look familiar. I guess not. He looks kind of familiar, but he also looks like every nerdy white dude. Well, what are your alt picks for this movie? I don't have one. I didn't I I couldn't I didn't. Nothing. Didn't even bother. No, that's untouchable.
Yeah. Uh I'm gonna be really pretentious and recommend uh recommend the movie JCVD. Have you heard about it from 2008? Starring Jean-Claude Van Damme. Oh no. He plays a fictionalized version of himself that is uh essentially broke and going through a divorce, and he goes to a bank and it happens it's being robbed and he's held hostage, but he like one of the bank robbers has him like move a filing cabinet in front of the window or something like that, and like the cop a cop outside is like Jean-Claude Van Damme is robbing the bank. They think he's the bank robber. Yeah. That's kind of the setup for the movie, and it's him like navigating being held hostage while people think he's robbing the bank, and then a bunch of fans like start showing up around the bank to support him, and it's this whole like inner international story. Are you a big uh Van Damme fan? I would not say I'm also maybe a little young for like I've seen Bloodsport and some of Hard Target. Hard Target. Yeah. I like I've seen those movies, I don't remember them well, and I liked him better than Steven Segal. Um well, yeah. But like, yeah, I mean they were kind of in the same category. Yeah. Um, he just never had the like the charisma of Arnold Schwarzenegger, I think. Yeah. And I don't think I enjoyed the fighting as much as like some like I don't like I love Bruce Lee movies and uh a lot more than I don't I know they're different eras, but it's because he's white, isn't it? No, I mean uh I like I like Arnold. I mean I know it's not martial arts, but like I'm trying to think about an an equivalent. It's hard to think of like other people in this category. Like I I appreciate some of the stuff he's done, but like yeah, I wouldn't say I was like a fan fan. JC D D, that movie, I thought was really funny and really well done. Like I thought he was really good in it. And it's like the only movie I've seen where he's not just a like, I don't know, generic villain or hero in an action movie.
Um like has that like has that model of actor like died out the van damagal type that's like into martial arts and it kind of feels like it, but I think it's moved more to like direct video or streaming. Um like I was gonna say like Donnie Yen, but I feel like I'm thinking of like white dudes that are like the buff action hero. Like I don't know, I can't think of anybody like that anymore.
Yeah, there's a movie I've seen recently. The Stallone type. Yeah, I'm not gonna remember his name, but um, I think he did a bunch of stunt work and then um Scott Adkins. Uh does that name ring a bell? He was a stunt guy, and then he has been doing his own movies. Uh let's see.
He does look like uh like looking at his Google images. He's like kind of uh the same vibe.
Yeah, like he was in uh John Wick 4 and he was in like one of the Ip Man movies. And yeah uh uh I like the Ip Man movies. But I watched a couple of his like the ones he starred in, and he like it's they're not like really good. I can't remember the name of the one that I watched. Was he in uh Accident Man and there are two accident man movies that he starred in and I think I think directed. No, he wrote he wrote them.
And it's like, yeah, exactly what you would you would you lump like Jason Statham in with like a John Claude Van Damme type? Kind of.
Um he's more like uh he definitely doesn't have the martial arts prowess that Jean Claude has. Like John Claude, if you read his background, like he's legit good at martial arts and he studied ballet, and like I guess not to throw any shade on Statham, like I don't know his background, but I think he's just more like tough guy.
Yeah. Uh yeah, like Vinny Jones or something. Right. Like I think John Claude is is like actually has a discipline that he studies and yeah, similar to Bruce Lee and some of the you know other uh icons of martial arts.
Like I think he's you know, I think people respect him in that field.
Much more than Seagal. I don't like Steven Seagal. Uh yeah. Going on record uh heard.
Uh yeah, hopefully we won't have to cover any Stephen Seagull movies. I don't know that they want to. Yeah. I I don't know how many of them like reach the level of like notoriety in box up. Like they're just so many that are just like straight to DVD or straight to streaming.
Let's see. Is uh how what's hard to kill? How uh bad was that? That's a 33. That's too high. All right, I'll have to do some research. All right.
Well, I think that's all we have for the Street Fighter. Yeah. Looking forward to the new one. Uh if you have any comments, thoughts, questions, email us at the worst moviepodcast at gmail.com. And please like, subscribe, all that stuff. I'm Ade.
I'm Aaron. Thanks for listening to the worst movie podcast.